How to impress a client

I was thumbing through my August issue of Entrepreneur magazine when I came across an ad that made me think: How desperate do you have to be if you would actually use this product?

Here’s what the ad said:

“Want to impress a new client? No problem. Steal the Time can help you pretend to be ridiculously rich and successful. Pay a monthly or yearly membership fee and you’re all set to lease luxury timepieces for a fraction of their retail cost.”

I went to the website to see if this was legit. It appears it is. I could rent a Girard-Perregaux Le Chaux-De-Fonds for a mere $279 per week or $820 per month. I paused to imagine how impressed my new client would be when I showed up for my appointment wearing this handsome timepiece and my Wal-Mart suit.

Wait… I couldn’t wear a suit. Suits have long sleeves and if I were going to spend that kind of dinero on a watch… excuse me… timepiece... then I would want to make sure my client would be able to see me sporting it. So my plan is I’ll rent this sucker and then wear it with a short sleeve shirt and tie. I can only imagine how impressive I would look. I’ll be sure when I’m talking to my client that I point to my watch and announce the time like a town crier. Surely my client will notice… and surely they will be duly impressed.

I’ve got it all figured it. I just hope they don’t ask me to pronounce the name of the “timepiece” for I will then surely show I am a product of West Virginia public skoolin.’